Time for another exciting episode of Shotgun Saturday Night. This is the first episode of the show that wasn’t overlapping with WWF Superstar and the show isn’t coming to us from Europe so we’ll have an idea of what the new Shotgun Saturday Night format is going to look like going forward so let’s get to it!
Meanwhile in the Arena…
We’re in Worcester, MA and before things get underway Brian Pillman comes out and joins Jim Ross at the announce table as he will apparently be calling the action with JR tonight. This is apparently Pillman’s first appearance on TV since Austin broke his ankle back at the end of 1996 in such a fashion that folks in wrestling still refer to using a chair to break someone’s ankle as “Pillmanizing” said ankle.
As Pillman gets his headset on and gets situated, JR hypes up some of the action we’ll see tonight including a new Shotgun Saturday Night segment, “Sunny Under the Covers.” Pillman then says that it’s good that the show is late at night since the censors are probably in bed already but it doesn’t really matter anyway because if the censors get mad about something he says he’s less likely to get fired than Ross would be because he can just go work somewhere else like he always has.
Match 1: Bob Holly vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley (w/ Chyna)
Chyna is now officially Chyna after nearly a month of being on TV. As she and Helmsley head out we get highlights of what went down between the two of them and Goldust and Marlena on Monday Night Raw.
As the match gets under way Jim Ross says that Helmsley and Holly have a lot in common as they are both former Intercontinental Champions. I immediately pause the episode and pull up Bob Holly’s Wikipedia page because I have zero recollection of him holding the belt. Granted my knowledge of the New Generation era has some holes in it but I’ve seen enough from that period to know who held titles.
Regardless, after checking Wikipedia I can safely say that Jim Ross is incorrect as Bob Holly was never recognized as the Intercontinental Champion. That said this isn’t Jim Ross just being bad at his job and calling the AEW Championship the AWA Championship or something. There was an angle on the April 30, 1995 episode of Action Zone where Holly did beat the then current champion, Jeff Jarrett, in a match for the Intercontinental Championship. He was declared the winner and awarded the belt but then it was discovered that Jarrett had had his foot on the rope so the decision was reversed and the title was held up. The two would have a rematch the following week on the May 7th episode of Action Zone for the now vacant Intercontinental Championship. Jarrett won this match and again became the WWF Intercontinental Champion and the ten minutes or so between Holly winning the belt and the decision being reversed are not recognized by the WWF as him holding the title.
Helmsley and Holly lock up and we’re off to the races. They work to the corner where Helmsley takes a swing at Holly but Holly ducks and puts the boots to Helmsley. Helmsley, however, turns things around and sends Holly into the corner but ends up missing on a corner charge and getting schoolboyed by Holly for an early near fall.
Hunter mounts a bit of a comeback and goes for an Irish whip but Holly reverses it and hip tosses Helmsley. He follows up with an arm drag and then works over Helmsley with an arm bar while over on commentary Pillman starts ranting about Stone Cold, calling him “a false prophet.”
Back in the ring Holly again arm drags Helmsley and then grabs an arm bar. Helmsley gets back to his feet and we get a rope running spot that ends with Helmsley nailing Holly with a high knee. Helmsley follows with a back breaker.
Holly comes back with an INVERTED ATOMIC DROP and then lays into Helmsley with a series of rights. He then sends Helmsley off the ropes but telegraphs the back body drop and pays for it with a knee to mug to take over on offense. Helmsley then hits Holly with the neckbreaker before working him over with a series of blows in the corner. He follows with a suplex on Holly and then the kneedrop to the forehead which earns Helmsley a near fall.
We then get a shot of Chyna mean muggin’ down on the floor which leads to Pillman declaring her face to be “the face that launched a thousand plastic surgeons.”
Back in the ring, Helmsley heads up top but ends up getting crotched on the top rope. Holly heads up with him and looks for a superplex only for Helmsley to block it and send Holly crashing face-first onto the mat. Holly, however, manages to recover and nail Helmsey with a shot to the gut as he comes off the top with a flying nothing.
He then runs wild on Helmsley, nailing him with a pair of clotheslines before sending him off the ropes and hitting a Frankensteiner for two. Holly then follows up with a dropkick and heads up top. He comes flying off with a diving knee but Helmsley avoids it and then hits the Pedigree to pick up the win.
Winner: Hunter Hearst Helmsley
This was a perfectly acceptable TV match though I’m kind of surprised that Chyna didn’t get involved at all since they’re kind of building her up as Helmsley’s heater. [**]
Hype!
We get a video hyping up WrestleMania 13. A whole three matches get mentioned. Even though I know of at least one other match that is signed for the show at this point.
Match 2: Doug Furnas & Phil LaFon vs. The Headbangers
That one match that I know was also announced that wasn’t mentioned in the preceding WrestleMania hype video was a Four Way Elimination Tag Team Match which is probably the reason we’re getting this match since both teams will be in that match.
LaFon and Mosh start things off for their respective teams and as they lock up over on commentary Pillman suggests someone check the pulses of Furnas and LaFon because they don’t seem as if they’re conscious.
Mosh ends up sending LaFon into the corner and then charges in but LaFon attempts to avoid it by floating over but Mosh catches him and dumps him out onto the apron. LaFon, however, cuts Mosh off with a shoulder to the gut and then comes back in with a sunset flip that earns him an early near fall. He then arm drags Mosh, hanging on and working over the Headbanger’s arm with an arm bar while over on commentary Pillman talks up the Headbangers for being wild men who don’t give a single fuck what anyone thinks about them.
Furnas knocks Mosh back into his corner with a shoulder tackle but that allows Mosh to make the tag to Thrasher. Thrasher and Furnas lock up and Furnas quickly takes the Headbanger down to the mat where he slaps on a headlock. Thrasher gets out of the hold and back to his feet but Furnas grabs a waistlock and quickly brings Thrasher back down to the mat. Thrasher, again, gets out of the hold and then makes the tag to Mosh who looks to slam Furnas. Furnas, however, blocks the attempt and slams Mosh instead in a really awkward looking spot.
There’s then an Irish whip and Mosh comes off the middle rope with a clothesline that’s good for two. Mosh goes for another Irish whip but Furnas reverses it and takes Mosh’s head off with a clothesline. LaFon then comes in and nails Mosh with a leg lariat and then a shoulder block leading to a near fall. Furnas and LaFon then send Mosh off the ropes for a double back body drop leading to another near fall that the crowd gives less than a single solitary fuck about.
Thrasher comes back in and slams Furnas for two before slapping on a chinlock. Furnas fights out of the hold with elbows only to end up running right into a side slam for another near fall. Both men make tags to their partners but the tag to LaFon was the hotter of the two as he comes in and runs wild on Mosh, catching him with a spinning heel kick that’s good for two. LaFon then plants Mosh with a slam before coming off the middle rope with a senton for another near fall. A snap suplex follows earning LaFon another two count.
Mosh hot shots LaFon to cut him off and then follows by wish-boning his legs before tagging Thrasher back in. LaFon, however, catches him off guard with a sunset flip for another near fall. Furnas comes in with a powerslam for two and follows with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex for yet another near fall the crowd doesn’t care about.
Things then start to break down as Mosh barely gets LaFon over the top rope and out to the floor. Everyone ends up brawling in the ringside area while the referee counts in the ring. Eventually the bell is rung and the ring announcer declares the match to be a double count out.
All four men brawl back into the ring and as referees show up to try and restore order over on commentary Pillman bemoans the fact that Furnas and LaFon waited until after the match had been thrown out to do something interesting.
Winner: Double Count Out
This kind of sucked. Furnas and LaFon are good when they’re in there with other workrate guys or even mediocre guys that can get carried to a good TV match but the Headbangers are neither of those things so this wasn’t that great. No one seemed to be on the same page and then there was a double count out like eight minutes in. I don’t know why this makes me so irrationally angry but it does. If you’re doing a DQ or a double count out or something don’t spend more than a couple of minutes on match that precedes the fuck finish. [½]
Highlights for Children!
We then get some highlights of the misunderstandings and bad blood that has been brewing between the tag team champions, Owen Hart and the British Bulldog.
Meanwhile in the Ring…
Speaking of the Champions they come out for an in-ring interview conducted by Lance Wright who I absolutely do not remember being in WWF at all. He asks them if they are going to be on the same page at WrestleMania when they are set to defend the tag team titles against Vader and Mankind.
Owen says that he and Bulldog have no issues. He admits that Bulldog beat him fair and square for the European Championship but then adds that had he really tried his best the outcome would have been different but that’s beside the point as they now have to focus on the tag team titles. Owen says that Vader and Mankind are two of the toughest men in the business and outstanding competitors but they lack something that he and Bulldog have: teamwork.
Bulldog reiterates that he and Owen have no animosity towards each other. He says that they’re the best tag team around today but there’s one thing that not even he and Owen can hope to accomplish at WrestleMania and that is making Vader and Mankind any uglier than they already are. He and Owen then leave.
Match 3: Flash Funk (w/ The Funkettes) vs. Bert Centeno
Funk gets a whole-ass entrance with his dancers which is funny because he’s taking on Bert Centeno who is very clearly “enhancement talent” and is already in the ring when we come back from break.
Funk and Centeno lock up and after a series of holds and reversals Funk ends up with control of Centeno’s arm. Meanwhile over on commentary Pillman mocks the shit out of Centeno, asking if they found him in a homeless shelter. Jim Ross tells him to chill out and says that Centeno’s just a guy trying to make a living like everyone else on Shotgun Saturday Night but Pillman has zero chill and keeps harping on how much of a loser Bert Centeno is.
This is kind of weird because in the ring Flash Funk is giving Centeno a shocking amount of the match. He gets Funk in a hammerlock for a bit but Funk gets out of the hold and takes Centeno down with a head scissors. He follows up with a drop toe hold into a leg lock but Centeno gets out of the hold and snaps off a head scissors of his own.
Centeno sends Funk off the ropes but gets hit with a shoulder tackle. Funk then heads up and connects with a diving shoulder tackle and then hits a leg lariat. Centeno comes back with another head scissors and then follows up with a clothesline before heading up top. He connects with a cross body into a pin that gets a two count before Funk kicks out.
Centeno then looks for an Irish whip but Funk reverses it and sends Centeno into the corner. Funk then charges in after him with a clothesline before hitting a spinning heel kick. He then plants Centeno with a scoop slam and hits a leg drop for a good near fall. Funk then heads up top and connects with the 450 splash to put Bert Centeno away.
As Funk gets his arm raised Jim Ross tells us that Flash Funk will take on Billy Gunn during the WrestleMania Free For All.
Winner: Flash Funk
For a squash match Funk gave Centeno way more than I would have expected. It was fine but nothing special. [NR]
Highlights for Children!
We then get highlights from Raw of Ken Shamrock being named the special referee for the submission match between Stone Cold and Bret Hart at WrestleMania. Bret Hart and Stone Cold both show up to interrupt each other and threaten grievous bodily harm to Ken Shamrock if he tries to fuck them over.
Match 4: Hector Garza vs. Heavy Metal
As Hector Garza makes his entrance we get a clip of him taking out a pile of humanity with a corkscrew tope from this past Monday’s episode of Raw. Heavy Metal, meanwhile, is already in the ring where he’s taking off his KISS t-shirt.
The match begins and Garza looks for a waistlock only for Heavy Metal to grab the ropes. Metal then grabs a headlock and takes Garza down but Garza quickly counters out of the hold. There’s a whip to the ropes and Heavy Metal plants Garza with a spinebuster. He then grabs a leg lock but Garza makes it to the ropes for the break.
An Irish whip leads to Garza hitting a dropkick. Metal then looks for a handspring elbow but completely misses and nearly gets pinned. Garza then heads up top and goes for a twisting senton but Heavy Metal avoids that and Garza eats shit. Metal then goes for a pin but Garza manages to get his shoulder up.
Heavy Metal sends Garza off the ropes and then grabs a handful of hair and sends him face-first into the mat. There’s another Irish whip but this time Garza kicks Heavy Metal’s leg out from under him and sends him into the ropes. Metal comes back and ends up sending Garza over the top rope, onto some ringsteps which are randomly up against the middle of the ring apron for some reason instead of up against the ring post like it generally was in the WWF. It looked like it sucked for Garza and on that note we head to break. TAPE MACHINES ARE ROLLING!
Back from break we find Heavy Metal bringing Garza back into the ring from the apron with a suplex. He then looks for a springboard moonsault on Garza but misses and ends up getting put into a modified camel clutch. An Irish whip leads to Garza nailing Heavy Metal with a diving clothesline. Garza then looks to follow up with a dropkick but Metal side steps it and then gets a camel clutch locked on.
Garza fights back to his feet but gets sent into the corner by Heavy Metal who then charges in after him. Garza avoids the charge and then hits Heavy Metal with a missile dropkick. He then hits a standing moonsault to put Heavy Metal away and pick up the win.
Winner: Hector Garza
I think I’ve mentioned in other reviews of 1997 shows where AAA guys have shown up but it’s wild how much random shit Vince was willing to try out in order to right the ship. “WCW got popular by having Mexican wrestlers on the show? I should try that too!” The match itself wasn’t great but I do love the fact that like 80% of it was structured around guys just eating shit on dives and flips and stuff. [**]
Meanwhile in Dok Hendrix’s Lair…
Dok is back to hype up the show at Madison Square Garden on Sunday. He goes over the entire card but I’m not going to bother doing that here since that’s the next WWF ’97 show I’m going to watch.
Meanwhile on the Stage…
With less than a minute of time left (Jim Ross announces as much) it’s finally time for “Sunny Undercover.” There’s a bed on the stage and Sunny comes out in a negligee and climbs into it but as she begins to talk Jim Ross thanks us for watching and promises we’ll get Sunny Undercover on next week’s show. What the fuck? How do you run out of time on a taped show? Could you have not tightened shit up somewhere? Or cut all references to it if there wasn’t enough time. I know Nitro did this kind of shit all the time at this point in 1997 but that was a main show and it was live. Worldwide wasn’t ending with Chris Cruise or whoever screaming about being out of time.
Final Thoughts
The opening match was a pretty decent TV match and while the Hector Garza vs. Heavy Metal match wasn’t the best, I’m a huge fan of matches like that on B-shows like this that make you go “Huh…so he had a match in the WWF? Wild.”
There was some stuff I didn’t think was great on this show. First the bait and switch shit with Sunny was some carny bullshit but I’m not longer a horny teenage boy so I’m not exactly mad that a lady on stage in her underwear got cut for time. The more annoying thing was Brian Pillman on commentary. Of all the people who I’ve heard in the booth since I started watching these he’s maybe the most annoying. He’s a dick to everyone and buries everything that’s happening in the ring but not ever in a way that’s ever funny or clever. I hope this was a one off thing and next week we get Cornette or Vince or whoever sitting in with JR again.
Those are minor gripes though and overall the show was a perfectly acceptable hour of TV wrestling. A couple weeks in to the new Shotgun I have a pretty good idea of what we’re going to get going forward: a couple random midcard matches, a squash or two, and maybe one or two largely unimportant interview segments along with some Raw recaps. All perfectly fine to half watch during my lunch break.
Atomic Drop 