We open on a sunset-lit gymnasium. Cage, looking jacked as fuck, is doing curls when Dario Cueto opens. Cueto tells him, “I like a man who takes the bull by the horns, but, you my friend, you take the bull by the huevos,” and gives him a championship match against Prince Puma tonight.
Cage tells him that he will win the title tonight because he’s a machine. This week his declaration of being a machine is paired with a hard zoom on his eyes like something out of a 1970s kung fu movie. This owns so hard.
The episode of Lucha Underground I watched the other day kind of put me on a Lucha Underground kick so here’s another review of an episode from Season 1. Again we kick things off with a brief recap of what’s been going on in the Temple. This time the video package is focused on Big Ryck, Pentagon Jr., Drago and King Cuerno, so I’m guessing those are the dudes that are going to be featured in this episode.
It’s been awhile since I’ve watched any Lucha Underground so it’s time to rectify that. We start things off with a prestige drama-esque previously on Lucha Underground recap that shows us stuff that previously happened that will undoubtedly be important in understanding this particular installment. Since it’s been over a month since I last checked out an episode from this season of LU this recap thing is invaluable to me.
We begin things this week with people in traditional Aztec garb (I guess) dancing about the ring while drummers drum. Dario Cueto is in the middle of the ring with the new Lucha Underground Championship. He tells us that tonight we are going to crown the first Lucha Underground Champion in a match he came up with completely on his own: AZTEC WARFARE!
We’re at the Sugar Mill in New Orleans for this crossover event between Impact (née TNA) and Lucha Underground. Our hosts for the evening are Matt Striker and Josh Mathews. ECW ’09 commentary team all up in this mug!
Melissa Santos and some random blonde lady who is apparently Impact’s backstage interview lady come out to hype the crowd. Since this is on Twitch instead of basic cable Melissa Santos tells the crowd to make “some fucking noise,” or something like that before introducing the competitors for the first match.
We kick things off with a Previously on Lucha Underground reel showing us Black Lotus getting her arm broke by Pentagon Dark and then showing up with a gaggle of Japanese ladies to wreck shit on him. It’s time to Lucha!
Things kick off this week with a video package summarizing what went down last week with Chavo and Sexy Star as well as the ladder match between Johnny Mundo, Price Puma and Big Ryck. We get some credits and then it’s to the Temple for Lucha action!
We begin things backstage where Ezekiel “Big Ryck” Jackson is signing a contract with Dario Cueto. Dario tells him, “When I invited Johnny Mundo to Lucha Underground, I wanted to use him as an example that no matter the talent, the reputation, the flash, no one is safe. Put everyone on notice because violence is my favorite kind of entertainment.“ Champagne gets busted out and Big Ryck lights up a cigar.
Lucha Underground begins with Konnan, entering Dario Cueto’s office. The one time Wolfpac member tells Cueto that he stopped Prince Puma from coming into Cueto’s office and wrecking house on him after Cisco and Castro attacked Puma last week.
Dario offers Konnan a drink, but Konnan turns him down. Cueto tells him that Castro and Cisco for Big Ryck, not him and that he’s got no beef with Puma. Konnan then says that he wants a match…Puma vs. Big Ryck in a Boyle Heights Street Fight and asks Dario if he knows what a Boyle Height Street Fight is. Before Dario can reply, “I’m assuming it’s like a South Philly Street Fight or a Chicago Street Fight or any of the myriad of other geographically based street fights that exist in pro-wrestling,” Konnan tells him that it’s a fight, not a wrestling match and that anything goes.
Dario Cueto is amenable to this and agrees to the match and then goes to take a sip from his booze, but Konnan snatches the glass out of his hands and is like, “You know what? I think I will take that drink after all,” and then chugs it and leaves the office. Dario has a look of disgust on his face and dumps the ice and liquor dregs from the glass into a trashcan.