WWE Saturday Morning Slam (December 8, 2012)

Saturday Morning Slam

It’s time for another exciting episode of the most electrifying thirty minutes on TV on Saturday mornings circa 2012! Voice Over Guy welcomes us to the show and informs us that this week the leader of the CeNation is going to be in action against Heath Slater of 3MB in the main event, but first we’re getting Titus O’Neil going up against Sheamus in our opening bout.

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WWE Saturday Morning Slam (December 1, 2012)

Saturday Morning Slam

Voice Over Guy welcomes us to a very special episode of Saturday Morning Slam emanating from Jolly Old England. He informs us that the main event will see the Usos taking on the team of Justin Gabriel and Tyson Kidd, but first our opening contest.

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WWF Badd Blood: In Your House (October 5, 1997)

WWF Badd Blood 1997.jpg

I’ve decided to take a look back at Badd Blood: In Your House. This is the PPV that gave us the first ever Hell in a Cell match as well as the debut of Kane. It was also, unfortunately, overshadowed by the unexpected death of Brian Pillman, which was discovered several hours before the show took place.

I watched this live on PPV back in the day, but outside of the three things I’ve mentioned I have no memory of anything that took place on this show. So let’s check it out and see what sort of hidden classics I’ve forgotten about since 1997.

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Sumire Natsu vs. Kana (Pro Wrestling Wave October 30, 2013)

So this is Sumire Natsu’s debut match and she’s going up against the woman who would become Asuka, Kana. Talk about a trial by fire.

We get a little pre-match promo from Natsu before the bout, though what she says I could not say, since my knowledge of Japanese is pretty much non-existent. After that she makes her entrance, getting the Goldberg treatment, as she she shown walking from the backstage area out to the ring (she lacks Goldberg’s phalanx of cops).

Kana, still in her Nazi zombie phase, heads out next and the match gets underway. Sumire offers a handshake, but Kana does not wish to abide by the Code of Honor. Sumire unloads on Kana with a bunch of forearm strikes that Kana just kind of shrugs off before unloading with strikes of her own.

Kana spends the bulk of the match toying with the rookie, swatting her out of the air when she goes for dropkicks and halfheartedly kicking at Sumire when she ends up on the mat.

Sumire gets a couple near falls that basically do nothing but fire Kana up who tosses her around a bit and then gets her to tap out with an armbar about eight minutes into the match.

Random ladies hit the ring with icepacks and stuff to tend to Sumire and then Kana kneels down and shakes her hand. I guess in taking a hellacious beating, Sumire Natsu earned Kana’s respect.

We then get a post-match promo thing from Sumire recorded backstage, but again, I’ve got no idea what she was talking about.

Winner: Kana

I guess for a debut match it wasn’t as bad as it could have been. Sumire was good on the sell, but a lot of her offense looked kind of sloppy and it looked like she botched a couple things. Since this match took place five years ago, I know she gets much better than she was here but as a stand alone match this wasn’t particular inspired. [*⅔]

NXT (October 23, 2014)

NXT_Wrestling_logo

Time for some more NXT. This was a review I’d done for an old blog I had. I’ve cleaned it up and added the proper Atomic Drop formatting we’ve all come to know and love, so let’s take it away.

We start things off with the standard issue NXT opening theme song before heading to Full Sail University for our opening contest. Rich Brennan, Alex Riley, and Albert/Tensai/Giant Bernard are on commentary.

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IWA Japan Shin-FMW Tarzan Goto in Bathhouse Wrestling (August 21, 1995)

IWA Japan Bathhouse

Between my quest to watch every episode of WWE’s short lived show for kids, Saturday Morning Slam and my biweekly forays into WCW Nitro from the year 2000, I’ve watched a lot of ridiculous shit as of late, but it’s been a hot minute since I’ve reviewed any Japanese garbage wrestling from the mid-90s so I think I should probably rectify that. Today we’re looking at a tape from IWA Japan featuring the infamous bathhouse deathmatches. Yes deathmatches…there are more than one.

Before we go any further I should probably warn you that this review might have some GIFs with tits in them due to the nature of this match. Consider the page break deal your NSFW tag. Don’t read more if you don’t want to see boobs or butts. You’ve been warned.

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WWE Saturday Morning Slam (November 24, 2012)

Saturday Morning Slam

Voice Over Guy welcomes us to a very special post-Thanksgiving episode of Saturday Morning Slam and gives us a rundown of what’s going on this week before we head to the arena for our opening contest. We’re apparently getting a pie eating contest in addition to our regular mid-carders wrestling for wrestling’s sake matches we usually get.

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Atsushi Onita vs. Masahiro Chono (NJPW Strong Style Symphony – New Japan Spirit 1999 April 10, 1999)

I suppose a little backstory is in order. In 1998 Atsushi Onita left FMW after being told by then owner, Shoichi Arai, that due to Onita’s attitude towards other wrestlers on the roster and FMW’s shift away from deathmatch wrestling, he needed to leave.

Somehow this lead to Onita showing up in New Japan and challenging Riki Choshu to a barbed wire deathmatch. Choshu, who was serving as booker at the time, was retired and so in January 1999 booked Onita in a match against Kensuke Sasaki. Onita lost that match but still persisted and demanded Choshu come out of retirement to face him which brings us to today’s match.

Again, Choshu refused to face Onita, instead booking him in a match against former IWGP Heavyweight Champion, Masahiro Chono…in a goddamn exploding barbed wire match.

The match begins with a pair of the greatest ring entrances I’ve ever seen in my life. Onita is out first. He saunters down to the ring with a folding chair slung over his shoulder while “Wild Thing” blares. The normally staid Japanese audience gives him the WCW audience treatment and pelts him with trash as he walks down the aisle. At one point he stops, unfolds his chair and after lighting up a cigarette slumps down into it and smirks while the fans continue to hurl garbage at him.

Chono then proceeds to roll in a goddamn Humvee and march down to the ring with a cigar clenched between his teeth. He seems to be unsure of how to actually get into the ring since this is his first time in an exploding barbed wire deathmatch, but ultimately rolls into the ring and it’s time for the match to begin in earnest.

Like most Japanese deathmatches of yore, this begins with some basic wrestling and punch-kicking with teases of guys getting thrown into the barbed wire only for them to throw on the breaks at the last second. Eventually Chono gets Onita in the STF and some sirens sound which I guess means the bombs are now activated or something.

Chono releases the hold and grabs the chair that Onita had brought out with him and hurls it at him only for Onita to duck. The chair flies into the barbed wire, setting off an explosion that knocks both men and the referee on their asses in one of the best spots of the entire match.

We then get some back and forth with both guys ultimately ending up in the exploding barbed wire. Onita’s arm is opened up pretty good after he goes into the ropes so Chono beats on and yells “This is not wrestling!” at him in English for some reason.

Eventually there’s a ref bump that involves the referee, Onita, and Chono all going into the barbed wire and having it explode. A new referee, who had been out on the floor wearing ski goggles for the entire match, hops into the ring and checks on his fallen co-worker (the other ref was wearing a completely different uniform which said WAR on the back of his shirt so I don’t know if they actually worked together or not) while Chono has a visible pin on Onita.

Onita manages to kick out by the time the new ref realizes there’s a pin to be counted. Chono spams Yakuza Kicks on Onita but Onita keeps kicking out. Onita gets back to his feet and grabs a side headlock. Chono tries to get out of it with a backdrop suplex but Onita holds on and gets back to his feet driving Chono back into the barbed wire for another explosion.

Both men are down so the referee begins to administer a ten count. Onita staggers back to his feet, but then promptly collapses and the match ends with a double knock out.

Winner: Double Knock Out

Aside from the twin novelties of seeing a No Rope Explosive Barbed Wire Deathmatch being contested in a New Japan ring and Masahiro Chono in a garbage wrestling match this match is not particularly good. As is generally the case with these things there are a couple high spots but the bulk of the match is just mediocre brawling while guys attempt to push each other into the barbed wire.

The ending was kind of a disappointment too but I guess it lead to Chono and Onita respecting each other and teaming up with Chono to take on nWo Japan later that year because NJPW in 1999 was insane. [**]