The Hype Bros. (WWE November 2016)

Not since Dusty Rhodes and Sapphire tried to sell me an Ultimate Warrior “suck cup,” has a duo of wrestlers hocking WWE merchandise filled me with as much glee as Messrs. Ryder and Rawley do in this advertisement for the WWE Shop.


Kowabunga (USWA July 1990)

The year was 1990 and America was gripped by Turtlemania.  The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were everywhere: on TV, in the movies, in the cereal aisle…everywhere.  The Turtles were big business, and down in Memphis where the adage red green equals green still holds sway, USWA decided to cash in on the Heroes on the Half-Shell.  Enter Kowabunga!

Seriously watch the video.  It is fucking insane.  A guy in a Turtle costume goes apeshit over TV before a guy dressed as Splinter more or less tells him to go to Memphis to wrestle Jeff Gaylord.  This really makes no sense at all because almost as soon as Kowabunga arrived in USWA everyone else was like, “I though he was just a moron in a suit, but he can wrestle.”  No one acts like he’s actually a turtle, so what the fuck is going on with this vignette?

Dusty Rhodes & Sapphire (WWF 1990)

I really want an Ultimate Warrior “suck cup.”